10/06 Update: Since we no longer write for the Edmond Sun, this section is temporarily housing our podcast links for our iTunes feed. All of the columns are in the archives menu if you feel like exploring.

These columns (as well as the 'releases') come from weekly content that we write for the Edmond Sun, out of Edmond, OK (though we live in Chicago). This page contains the archives for said column, many of which are in their pre-published, unedited state. Some titles and editing by Brendan Sinclair.

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A prostitute-stabbing work of cop-killing genius
Friday, November 05, 2004

In order to counterbalance all of the talk of God and virtue elsewhere in this issue, I'd like to talk to you about the newest item of staggering genius in the Grand Theft Auto series, San Andreas (released two weeks ago for the PS2). Though I'm not here to talk about the controversy surrounding GTA and it's violent brethren - mature enough parents will realize that videogames of all shapes and sizes aren't going away any time soon, and need to monitor their children's interests. I'm also not going to blab on about every specific new feature; sure, you'll probably learn a bit about the game from reading this column, but I'd rather you find most of them out for yourself while you're playing. I'm simply here to talk about why I think this game is as great as it is.

To get it out of the way first, San Andreas does not have amazing graphics, by any optimistic stretch of the imagination. The textures are often muddy or plain, there is massive pop-up and draw-in of buildings, cars, and trees, and the characters don't even have individual fingers during cut-scenes. However, San Andreas is still a gorgeous game. The design and architecture of every car, house and mountainside sunset are very deliberate and very organic, and even if the game doesn't have the polygons to back it up, this feels more like the real world than anything else I've played. The glare of the sun can blind you on the highway if it hits you just right, you can read the entire menu at the local fast food restaurant, and it's DARK in the desert at night. Of course, the feel of the game would be fairly irrelevant without the appropriate tactile responses of your actions, and every one of them feels equally authentic and entertaining. I've played through a good portion of the game and been to all three massive cities, and the vehicles I enjoy the most are two of the simplest - the mountain bike (awesome bunny hops) and the quad bike (an ATV with orgasmic handling). They maneuver perfectly, and riding either makes for simple thrills whether you're tooling down the street or plummeting down a canyon wall.

There's also the aerial additions. Like, for instance, taking a helicopter up into the sky until the clouds obscure the ground below, and then plummeting towards said ground only to pull your parachute open at the last second. And then finding your charred chopper ten blocks away. There's even a jetpack I have yet to find, which is almost inconceivably cool. The heights that you can now launch a vehicle from are also exponentially larger; the only thing cooler than biking off of a building is biking off of a mountain. Another huge difference here, which makes perfect sense given the enormous size of the state that you'll explore, is that getting there is half the fun. Whether you're on your way to rocket launch some gas tankers or shiv a pimp, you're rarely find yourself at your destination without having stopped off at several towns, shops, or activities along the way. You'll end up playing pool, jumping rivers, shopping for a new hat, stealing a wiener truck, controlling a wrecking ball at a construction yard, all before you get to the meat of the mission, which is usually awesome in itself.

Making your character yours can also be a big part of the game if you want it to be, and it's miles more compelling and streamlined than the character development of Fable, The Sims, you name it. You can go to the gym and work out (which will actually work out your fingers), and you'll see the difference next time you go for a jog. You can decide on what you're wearing, head to toe, and the ladyfolk that roam the streets will comment appropriately. You can swim and swim and swim until your stamina and muscle are second to none, or you can pig out on burgers and chili dogs and watch your character struggle to catch up to a slow-moving bicycle on foot. It's never intrusive, but it allows you to become what's important to you, and can drastically affect the game if you spend enough time with it.

Finally, and there will never be enough space for it all, I'd like to tell you about the expansive countryside that lies between each city. Earlier in the game, when I had driven out to the woods to see just what the fuss was about, I decided that the game was too big and that no great use could be made of the space. There was no chaos, no people randomly shooting at you, and no sirens. It took some forced time away from the city with just me, my motorcycle, and the country radio station (anything else would be HIGHLY inappropriate) to realize how truly magical it is. Kind of like the real countryside, in real life. Sure, the missions you'll get into out there are fantastic (running over people with a crop thresher, off-road ATV uzi fights), but it's nice just to get away from it all. You can just cruise, and it feels really, really great. I even felt bad hitting passing drivers, thinking that they were probably having as nice a time as I was. I parked my car properly in a diner's parking lot in the middle of nowhere, for pete's sake. It makes you respect your environment, and in a game as forcibly "adult" as GTA, that's nothing short of a miracle.

- Nick


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